Let's Dance!

Arden and I love to dance. Early in our marriage we took dance classes with a group of friends at a club and steakhouse in Larson, ND. We had just moved to Noonan and taken a class on Couple's Communication at our church with many of these same couples. We formed lifelong friendships with these couples and found lifelong enjoyment in dancing. Our favorites are fast waltzes and two steps but we also learned how to polka, schottische (sp?) and tango. What fun it was to have a night away from our young family and to make new friends. Now the challenge is finding good music to dance to and to have the energy to stay out that late since most dances don't start until 10pm!

We are familiar with the saying  "Dance Like No One's Watching" but that is hard to put into practice. Lee Ann Womack says it well in her song "I Hope You Dance"

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance
I hope you dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin'
Lovin' might be a mistake, but it's worth makin'
Don't let some Hellbent heart leave you bitter

When you come close to sellin' out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance (Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along)
I hope you dance

I hope you dance (Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder)
I hope you dance (Where those years have gone?)

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance!

One of my favorite authors, Joyce Rupp, also says it well:

"Then David, girt with a linen apron, came dancing before the Lord with abandon." 2 Samuel 6:14  I ask myself: Do I do anything "with abandon" before my God? Have I ever been that wildly enamored of and grateful for this Gracious One's presence in my life? Does my heart sing with joy? Do my feet lift in happiness? Why is it, I wonder, that I more often pray about pain and troubles than I do about joy and delight? I know my laughter and my enjoyment of life can be as much prayer as my solemn and somber moments of reflection. King David's enthusiastic response to God has reminded me of this. Today I will look for something to dance about in my prayer and in my life.

©  Joyce Rupp, God's Enduring Presence Down 5.6# this  month and I feel like dancing!

What makes you upset or angry?

Righteous anger is typically a reactive emotion of anger over mistreatment, insult, or malice. It is akin to what is called the sense of injustice. (from Wikipedia)

Emily Litella is an elderly woman with a hearing problem who appeared 26 times on SNL's Weekend Update op-ed segmentin the late 1970s.^[2][3] Attired in a frumpy dress, sweater and 
Lisa Loopner glasses, Litella was introduced with professional dignity by the news anchors, who could sometimes be seen cringing slightly in anticipation of the malapropisms they knew would follow.

Gilda Radner (as Litella) would peer through her reading glasses and, in the character's trademark high-pitched, warbly voice, would read a prepared statement in opposition to an editorial that the TV station had supposedly broadcast. These sketches were, in part, a parody of the Fairness Doctrine, which at the time required broadcasters in the United States to present opposing viewpoints on public issues. Litella would become increasingly agitated as her 
statement progressed. Midway in her commentary, it would became apparent that she had misheard and/or misunderstood the subject of the editorial to which she was responding. A typical example:What is all this fuss I hear about the Supreme Court decision on a "deaf" penalty? It's  terrible! Deaf people have enough problems as it is!^[4]

The news anchor would interrupt Litella to point out her error, along the lines, "That's death penalty, Ms. Litella, not deaf ...death."^[4] Litella would wrinkle her nose, say, "Oh, that's very different...." then meekly turn to the camera and say, "Never mind."^[5] When Litella played against news anchor Chevy Chase (whom she often called "Cheddar Cheese"^[6]), he would be somewhat sympathetic to her. But when Jane Curtin took over the anchor role, she would scold Litella, "Every week you come on and you get it wrong," to which Litella would reply, "Bitch!"
[5]

Other misheard topics to which Litella responded included "saving Soviet jewelry" [Jewry],^[7] "endangered feces" [species],^[5]"violins on television" [violence],^[8] "presidential erections" [elections],^[9] "conserving natural racehorses" [natural resources],^[8] "firing the handicapped" 
[hiring],^[2] and "making Puerto Rico a steak" [state].^[10] About the last of these topics, she 
complained, "Next thing you know, they'll want a baked potato with sour cream!"^[11]

Val's words: What does anger and being upset have to do with a blog on healthy eating? When I am angry or upset I tend to turn to food for comfort. I use food to cover up the shame of blowing my top when I could have reacted in a calmer manner. Arden and I resolve conflict   better when we listen to each other and when we learn to laugh at how silly some of our conflicts are. Some good questions to ask myself are:

• Am I scared of losing control of the situation?
• Why is it important for me to have control?
• Does my personality make me more prone to anger? How can I better understand and celebrate my personality?
• Am I angry much of the time? Sometimes anger can indicate depression.
• Am I ill or on medication that would contribute to my anger?
• Can I find humor in the situation, more importantly can I laugh at myself?
• Is there another side that I need to hear?

• Do I feel heard?
• Is there a way to express my feelings calmly and clearly?
• Would it be better to wait and discuss this at another time?
• How can I become a "non-anxious" presence to those nearest and dearest to me?
• How can I focus on the positive?
• Is there someone I trust who I can talk to about my frustration? Will they give me their objective opinion about the situation?      Will they be honest with me?  

                                                                      

From an article in Christianity Today:  And Jesus expressed anger—at the Pharisees who exhibited such hard hearts (Mark 3:1-5) and at the crass commercialism that sullied the temple (Matthew 21:12-13; Luke 19:45-48)—to convey extreme displeasure over sin. Those reasons are the key to righteous anger.

How does this affect me? As Christ-followers, we're totally appropriate getting upset over sin, too. Evils such as abuse, racism, pornography, and child sex trafficking should incense us.

But no matter how reprehensible the people or activities we're condemning, we still aren't justified to sin in our responses: "When you are angry, do not sin, and be sure to stop being angry before the end of the day" (Ephesians 4:26, NCV). Those of us with confrontational personalities might want to ask ourselves the question, Is my motive to be right or to be righteous? before ripping into the offending parties.

Such considerations also help us be pokey in getting peeved: "Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God" (James 1:19–20, ESV). Instead of replying immediately, simply counting to ten before reacting usually leads to much better results in a contentious situation.

Then after we take offense, we should take redemptive action. Christians must get involved with organizations working to free children from slavery and volunteer at shelters working to protect battered women. We must lead the charge against hatred and oppression and cruelty!

Ultimately, if our outrage results in restoring people into loving, healing relationships with Jesus, it's righteous anger.

Lisa Harper has a Masters in Theology with an emphasis in biblical studies from Covenant Theological Seminary in St. Louis. She's a sought-after speaker and has written several books, including Holding Out for a Hero: A New Spin on Hebrews (Tyndale) and What the Bible Is All About for Women: A Book of Devotions (Regal). Visit her atwww.lisaharper.net.

Copyright © 2008 by the author or Christianity Today/Today's Christian Woman magazine.

Keeping Secrets

We all keep secrets. Some are fun such as the secret we kept from my sister and brother in law about their surprise 50th Wedding Anniversary Party this last weekend. There were numerous slips and rolled eyes or nods to re-direct conversation in the days leading up to the surprise party but they both didn't notice the slips and were totally surprised!  It was fun but exhausting to keep the secret. We were all glad when the time for the party arrived and we didn't have to worry about spilling the beans about it.

When we were foster parents, we were told that many families keep secrets about struggles and abuse and other horrific things and that the healthiest situations are when we can reveal these things to those closest to us. Often if we keep horrific secrets we turn to overeating or other addictions. It is in revealing the secrets that we find peace. It is common to think that we are the only ones who have suffered abuse or bullying or humiliation but we can often find others who have gone through similar things. We are not alone. Others can help us heal. My prayer is that we find someone whom we can become honest with....someone to share our secrets.

Here's an interesting excerpt from an article at  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/elena-brower/art-of-attention-ode-to-o_b_861861.html

"Lauren marvels at how easily people shift gears once she defines what’s included in a lie: those little details we hide from others, because we’ve deemed them irrelevant; or the way we tell most of the story, depending on who’s listening. She and I teamed up to create a class for yoga teachers, having 
learned from my smoking situation, about the stark divide between the lies we’re telling and the 
teachings we’re sharing. I was a hypocrite, plain and simple. The smoking was one of my lies. Telling people I’ve read such-and-such book after having glanced at the chapter titles is another funny catch. All of it is lying. Now, if I catch myself in a lie of any kind, I have fifteen minutes to come clean, from the moment I recognize my skewing of the truth. And the coming clean is always exhilarating, and brings me closer to my heart every time."

PS: Down 4.8 # since the start of this phase 3weeks ago. Let's Go!